Someone

Have you ever looked down on someone because of their race?

Have you ever judged someone one way and later found out how wrong you were?

Have you ever thought less of someone because of the way they looked?

Have you ever held a grudge against someone that lasted for years?

Have you ever been so angry at someone you avoided even looking at them?

Have you ever not accepted someone the way they are?

The key word in each one of these questions is “someone.” How do we treat the “someone’s” in our life is most important. Chances are, that you, like me, have botched it in this department. Whether it’s confessing our entanglement in racism and systemic privilege or just being a toad in a relationship, a first step in making things right is “confession.”

Most of us would prefer to eat a can of spam before we seek to practice confession. We have been taught that “looking good” is way more important than showing weakness or mistakes. It’s so stinking tough to ask people for forgiveness! Avoidance seems so much easier. Personal confession is tough too, as we admit to God our own private beliefs, albeit racist or hidden anger or judgments we hold tightly to. But, confession can be so freeing for all of us!

Confession involves surrendering our weaknesses and faults to the forgiving love of Christ. (Adele Ahlberg Calhoun, Spiritual Disciplines Handbook) I literally admit to God my natural propensity to rationalize away my sin, deny that it happened or pass the shame and blame on to someone else. True repentance means I open the bad in my life to God. (Calhoun) I stop hiding. I don’t pretend I'm somebody I’m not.

For me, when I understand that I’m tucked away in the safety net of God’s unfailing love, I’m more prone to ask Him to help me see myself as He sees me. I share with Him the sins that come to mind. I then ask God to forgive me and help me to change. His perfect love for me gives me freedom to share my junk with Him!

For those ‘someones’ in your life, ask the Lord, “Who have I injured recently through thoughtlessness, neglect, anger or judgment?” (Calhoun) If you need to initiate with a person, do so! As hard as that is, most people are so blown away by your willingness to confess your wrongdoing. It can be a beautiful time of reconciliation.

Don’t deny the hurt you feel from your experience. Sit in it. Feel it. But don’t stay in the pain forever. Allow this pain to push you on to forgiveness and which gives so much freedom!

“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” James 5:16

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

COVID People

Chara, our English Springer Spaniel, is a COVID dog. A COVID dog is a dog welcomed into their family during COVID season. COVID dogs are different than other dogs. They are anxious when their people leave. They struggle with attachment disorder, unreasonable expectations and tend to freak out with excitement when people knock at the door.

We’re learning to break the cycle of our COVID dog. She’s got unreasonable expectations that we can't possibly meet. We’re not always there for her beckoning call.

Hey, did you ever think that we’re COVID people? We don’t think about it now, but five or ten years from now, we’ll look back and reminisce about our COVID days. How did we handle COVID? What did we learn? What bad habits did we pick up?

It occurred to me that Chara has a good habit that I like! Chara loves being right beside us. Non-stop presence. If one of us moves about the house, Chara goes too. If we go outside, Chara goes outside. She doesn’t want to be out of our sight. She's a COVID dog.

With COVID, I’ve needed God more than ever! The isolation part of COVID has been tough for me. But, I’ve made it a point to start my day reading the Bible, being in God’s presence and praying. I’ve learned over the years that God’s presence is ALWAYS with me. So, I can invite Him into my day, ask Him questions, pray throughout the day and wait for His response. Non-stop presence with the God of the universe! That’s pretty amazing!

It reminds me of a classic book by Brother Lawrence, called The Practice of the Presence of God. Brother Lawrence died over 325 years ago, but his teachings about prayer are just as relevant today as they were back then. Brother Lawrence spent much of his life working in a kitchen as a dishwasher. But during his menial tasks, Brother Lawrence discovered a profound truth. You can experience God’s presence anywhere. Here are a few quotes from Brother Lawrence:

“We should establish ourselves in a sense of God’s presence, by continually conversing with Him.”

“Think often on God, by day, by night, in your business and even in your diversions. He is always near you and with you; leave him not alone.”

“The most holy and important practice in the spiritual life is the presence of God- that is, every moment to take great pleasure that God is with you.”

As you start this day, do you know that the God of the universe wants to walk with you too? Invite Him!

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Very Bad Days

“ACTIVE SHOOTER, RUN!” I had just pulled my cart up to the register at our local Cosco as Ben happily went off to get a hot dog. In one second, everything changed. I looked around and knew immediately it was time to get out…NOW!

With credit card in one hand and purse in the other, I abandoned my cart and took off with the crowd. We briskly pushed through a long, narrow exit to the outside. I then began to run as fast and far away as I could, hoping I’d catch up with Ben soon.

It wasn’t until we were safely home that we found out what really happened. A “masked” man had entered Cosco, smashed a jewelry case, pulled out a handgun, stole an undetermined amount of jewelry and then fled the scene with someone else. We had a “taste” of something very bad that day at Cosco. Thankfully, it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.

I think many of us are tired of the “very bad.” We’re tired of COVID. We’re tired of the unrest and volatility and hatred. We’re weary of systematic racism. We weary of the loss of life and spiking cases. We’re fearful for this fall season and the spreading of COVID in schools. What do we do? When I don’t know what to do, I pray. Will you join me?

Heavenly Father, We are concerned for the “very bad” things that are going on right now. Lord, each of us has been affected physically, emotionally and spiritually. We are disgusted, mad, angry, hurt, sad, fearful, impatient and just plain tired of all that’s going on. We don’t even know how to handle all of our emotions! So, we come to You, sovereign and perfect God, You, who unlike us, are never down, weary, irritated or impatient. You never mutter “Whatever….” You are always right there for us in the darkest, scariest of moments. Help us not just put our hope in a post-COVID world or a post-racism world or even a post-hatred world, even though we hope for these things! Help us put our hope in You! You, who are at work in ways we’ll only understand later. You, who use even the “very bad” in our lives for good. You, who sent your one and only Son to take on the sins of this world. You, who give us the glorious future in heaven as we trust in You. I lift my eyes to the glorious hope in the words of this song. Keep my heart in synch with this hope, Lord: “There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears. There will be a day when the burdens of this place, Will be no more, we’ll see Jesus face to face. But until that day, we’ll hold on to you always.” (Jeremy Camp, There Will Be a Day) Thank you, Lord, for that reminder.... I needed it! In Jesus’ name, Amen.

So, until that day, I’m gonna’ hold on to Him always. Hope has a name and His name is Jesus. He will get you through every “very bad” day.

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Transparent Masks

Masks are now a part of our daily lives. Insert sad face. Back when COVID hit, we received a good supply of standard blue face masks from Amazon Prime. I notice now how many upping their fashion game by coordinating daily outfits and masks. I guess I have no interest in mask fashion.

Recently, however, I purchased transparent masks to show my mouth. This is a great help for those that are deaf or hard of hearing. Transparent masks help people understand you better, but they also allow you to see each other’s smiles. More than ever, we all need a friendly face.

So, how can we reveal our transparent self while behind a mask?

Believe in people- I get it, we all sin and eventually, there will be something in every one of us that warrants being “canceled.” I’m sure I’ve been canceled many times in the cancel culture! But, I’m going to believe in people and see the good in them. Mike Mason writes “By looking at people with the eyes of faith-past all the masks, the games, the lies- we pierce through to the truth of the person whom God created. God did not create anyone to be a failure, a thief, a drunk a bore.” (Mike Mason, Practicing the Presence of People) Being involved in prison ministry helped me with this. Stop judging and start believing in people, no matter what they did in the past. Did you know that God does this for us?

We need people- Don’t get too comfortable in your isolation, especially you introverts. People need people. The apostle Paul, shows us clearly in 2 Corinthians 6:11-12 his need for others. But when his feelings weren’t reciprocated, he didn’t write them off. Instead, he prayed for them and yearned for them “We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us.” Now is the time to reach out to people and truly care. Now is the time to allow people to truly care for you. We really do need each other.

Love well- In 1 Peter 1:22, Paul tells us to “love one another deeply from the heart.” COVID calls us to get outside our box and look for ways to sincerely love people deeply from the heart. Pray for people regularly.  When you pray for someone regularly, you develop a love for them. Reach out and initiate a face time or a zoom call. Compliment people.  Notice something about them. Inquire about them, really listen and follow up. Send cards. People love to feel loved and valued. It takes a bit more creativity in COVID.

Go for being your true self- I can’t be my true self without trusting God with my whole heart. (Proverbs 3:5-6) Otherwise, I put way too much weight on what people think about me. When I trust Him with my heart, He helps me be my own true self. I have no need to hide from anyone. I can be my silly, goofy self. Free. Alive. Who doesn’t want that?

“God hath given you one face, and you make yourselves another.” Shakespeare, Hamlet

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Disillusionment

Disillusionment. Have you felt it lately? I have.

We can be disillusioned by the state of our country. We can be disillusioned by a relationship. We can disillusioned in our faith. We can be disillusioned by COVID. We can be disillusioned by our jobs. We can be disillusioned when our lives don’t go the way we want them to. 

Disillusionment is having a feeling of disappointment resulting from the discovery that something is not as good as believed it to be. It causes one to feel let down and begin to wonder “What in the world has happened?”

For me, I had a belief about how my life would turn out. I had plans of marrying young and having children. I felt like God was in those plans. But, after years and years of praying, things didn’t quite happen that way. It was tough, knowing God had my best, but wondered why He didn’t answer my prayers? It was cause for disillusionment.

It was during these years of singleness, that God solidified a marvelous truth: Jesus is the only One who can satisfy the ache in my human heart. I learned that I couldn’t put my trust in circumstances or how I thought my life “should” be.

I remember back then, looking to Jesus in the Gospels for help. Jesus didn’t put his trust in people, but in God. John 2:24-25 “But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men.” Jesus knew about human nature. Jesus was discerning. Jesus refused to be disillusioned by the way people treated Him. He entrusted His life to God and constantly prayed to the Father for help and guidance.

So, if we put our trust in human beings, politicians, peoples' opinion, finances, jobs, our health, etc, we will eventually be disappointed. Whatever is disillusioning to you today, please know that there is hope. God is hope. He has a beautiful plan for your life as you trust in Him. He can be your refuge and give you a new perspective amidst the craziness around you.

Refuse to be disillusioned. Stop demanding others be for you what they can never be. Invite God to be for you what only He can be. He will redeem Your pain and bring hope. Trust me on this. 

“The LORD is with me; so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me? Psalm 118:6

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.