To Trust or Not to Trust

I remember it well. The day I mistakenly aided a criminal. I was overseeing our church’s women’s retreat being held up near Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. It just happened to be one of coldest days of the year. The chill factor had to be something crazy like 35 below zero. The retreat had gone well and it was Sunday morning, the finale. I got up early and took a walk up to the front of the hotel. As I stepped out of my room, I heard this loud banging and someone yelling “Let me in!” There, at a side-door exit, was a bundled up man, shaking from the cold. I took pity on him and let him in.

That man pounding on the door proceeded to go up to the bar and steal liquor and cash out of the register. I was the kind and gracious one that had let him in. Great. Soon, I was being called up for an interview with the police. Thankfully, the man was caught and the retreat went on.

I seem to have forgotten that childhood lesson on stranger danger from my parents. I was just way too trusting. I didn’t think twice about letting the dude in from the cold. Of course, I’d let him in. It was dangerously cold. But, we just can’t trust everyone, can we?

Today, we are in a battle over who and what to trust. Whether it’s a politician or salesperson or even facebook post, how do we sort through all the opinions of our day?  During this era of opinions, I’m so glad I can run to God’s Word for advice and peace. Job 42:2 states “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted.”  Isaiah 46:9-10 states “Remember the things I have done in the past. For I alone am God! I am God, and there is none like me. Only I can tell you the future before it even happens. Everything I place will come to pass, for I do whatever I wish.”  When I allow these verses to seep into my mind, I find such comfort in a God that IS trustworthy.

In the midst of all the craziness and unrest in our country, we can place our trust in a Sovereign God. We can go back throughout time and see the intricate and distinct ways God cared for his people.  And today, He can use the unrest and outcome of this election. He can use our challenges and struggles. He can use all things for good, if we would but only trust Him.

When you feel like things are out of control? They’re not.  When you feel like God isn’t in control? He is. I invite you to consider trusting Him today. 

“Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a know God.” Corrie Ten Boom

“And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you,”Psalm 9:10

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Seeing Eye to Eye

If you haven’t been hiding out in the nearest cave, you’ve probably noticed a lot of conflict and disagreements in the news lately. Whether it’s opinions about the Presidential race or something so simple as a Cowboy quarterback controversy, conflict and disagreement are front and center stage.

No one likes conflict or even a sharp disagreement for that matter. Most people when asked about conflict, would lean toward just avoiding it. Conflicts can occur in healthy marriages, among friends, in the workplace, and in the world around us. We see conflicts arise on TV, twitter and Facebook as people communicate their opinions about any particular subject.

Conflict happens when we have a different perspective than someone else. That can lead to a disagreement. The disagreement can lead to painful words or what many often do, give the cold shoulder treatment. The cold shoulder treatment leaves part of the party in the unknown as to what took place. What is the ultimate goal of a cold shoulder?  Painful words can lead to a parting of ways. That' doesn't seem like a good way to deal with conflict either! So, how do we demonstrate a bond of peace when relationships get tested?

First, let’s realize that it’s OK to have a disagreement. We will not always see things entirely the same as someone else. Accept the person who thinks differently. Listen to them. Ask questions about their viewpoint. Don’t try to just get your opinion out. Stop the cold shoulder treatment. Have courage to discuss the issue at hand. You may not every find a resolution, but you can communicate with love, respect and honor.

Secondly, I believe our enemy, Satan, seeks to destroy relationships the best he can. He aims to put a wedge between people. It may start small, but build and build, until there is a wall between two people. Sometimes, we’re left to wonder what even happened to create this! Recognize Satan’s determination to bring conflict. Ask God for help and take the road of humility to restore what was lost.

Finally, love truly does conquer all. “The world will know that we are your disciples if we love one another.” (John 13:34)  Stop holding grudges. Put an end to the gossiping about other people. Start looking at your own faults instead of pointing the figure toward others. We are so quick to judge others that we fail to see the sin in our own hearts.  Learn to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19)

We may never see eye to eye on various matters in our day. But, each day, we have the privilege of pursuing peace and loving people well, even if we disagree. Any conflict in your life? May the peace of God restore, rebuild and renew broken relationships in your life today. 

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Persevering in the Long Haul

I was a bit nervous for the orthopedic appointment. But the excitement overshadowed my fears. Today was the day! Finally! No more pink cast! I had been warned about what how things would look under that cast, so I was only partially shocked at my poor, helpless, weak ankle and foot.  I’ll save the gory details. After getting schooled on using the boot, Ben and I left the office, relieved that the pink cast was in the trash. A celebration was indeed in order.

It didn’t take long to realize that this next leg of the journey would be just as challenging. Starting PT on the ankle. Walking in the boot. Dealing with swelling. Sleepless nights. This week, I just needed new hope, new encouragement to persevere for the long haul.

I really would prefer no trials in life, but if they come, brevity would be welcomed. Right?  But, when the trial goes on and on? That’s not always easy. As I’ve groveled with God about my challenges, I felt like He whispered sweet encouragements that I hope will be yours as well.

Trusting in faithfulness of God- In Psalm 139:16 it says “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”  So, God knew all about this trial before it happened? Yes. So, He allowed it? Yes.  I trust that my days are ordained for me. He will see me through. I will trust Him. Will you trust him in your trial as well?

Learn perseverance- There are times I want to give up. I get so tired of trying to get around. But, I can’t give up and you can’t either. God perseveres with us through everything we face. How can I not persevere with Him through this? At some point, we will be challenged in life. Perseverance says “I will persist in doing what is right even though doing so may produce more challenges, difficulties and suffering.”

Persevere in prayer- Sometimes, I pray to God and don’t get the result I want. I believe there are times when we benefit by not receiving an answer to prayer. It is during these times of waiting that I find God to be enough for me. I’m not just going to God to get an answer to my prayer. I’m going to God because I want more of God.  Don’t give up when God doesn’t answer your prayers right away.

Persevere with joy- There are times my face tells the story…..This is so hard. Yet, as much as possible, I seek to smile when I see people. I look for ways to joke about my circumstance. I want to rise above my circumstance and enjoy life NOW. This is the challenge God has given me. How about you?

“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

When I Don't Know What To Do

There are times when I don’t know what to say for these weekly Start Ups. Nothing comes at all. Nothing. I pray. I ask God for help. I have always, always felt His help in doing them. But, today, nothing seemed to come. I’m stuck. I just don’t know what to do or say. I’ve started about 10 different themes for this start up. Nothing clicked. 

God, what do you want me to do? I have to write something!

Sometimes, God is not quick with answers. But, He does answer prayers. I’m sure of that. As I lay on the couch with my pink cast propped up on the pillow, I had those dumpy feelings that no one really probably connects with me anyway. No one else ever feels stuck or speechless or boring or down in the dumps. Who am I? What do I have to say that can resonate with anyone? As these “Woo is me” feelings came over me, I stopped and somehow, God brought me back to reality.

God, that isn’t true! You can use me even when I’m feeling discouraged and defeated. I just have to trust you to carry me through.

So, what did God do with this Start Up that wasn’t? He gave me a song. He reminded me to stop. Worship Him. Let go of my defeated feelings. Pray and seek His face. Don’t turn to anything else but Him for help. So, here’s the song:

When I don’t know what to do

I’ll lift my hands

When I don’t know what to say

I’ll speak Your praise.

When I don’t know where to go

I’ll run to Your throne

When I don’t know what to think

I’ll stand on Your truth

When I don’t know what to do. (Chorus 1)

Lord, I surrender all

To your strong and faithful hand

In everything I will give thanks to you

I’ll just trust your perfect plan. (Verse 1)

(When I Don’t Know What To Do, by Tommy Walker, from the album Break Through: Live at Saddleback)

The next time you have those feelings of discouragement, defeat and don’t know what to do, consider God. I’m so grateful He brought me out of my negativity and gave me a song in my heart.

"I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in Him." Psalm 40:1-3

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Limitations

Limitation: A limiting condition; restrictive weakness; lack of capacity; inability or handicap. For the most part, we humans would prefer to ignore and hide our limitations. We want to appear strong, confidant, willing and able to do anything.

I don’t like feeling limited. I don’t like asking for help. Whether it’s asking for a wheel chair to get to the other side of a church campus or asking someone to fix me a plate at the potluck line, I really don’t like being limited. It stinks. Yet, God is teaching me to be patient with myself as I accept my limitations. I’m able to say what I can currently do and what I can’t do, with the eye of being willing to learn what I can. 

We all have limitations in our lives. Physical limitations. Time limitations. Financial limitations. Relational limitations. Fixing-stuff limitations.The list goes on. Whether it’s a temporary physical limitation or just something that is out of our “comfort zone”, we struggle to know how to deal in a healthy way with our limitations.

What are your limitations? Identify them and recognize them as such. It’s OK. Acknowledge that these limitations can be painful and hard to accept. Be determined to grow in some of your limitations. Ask God for strength when you feel limited and ineffective. Find others who have the skills you lack. It’s OK to ask for help. We sometimes think we can and should do it all. That’s not how God wired us. He wired us to work and serve together! It’s time to admit that we need help. 

The Bible is filled with examples of people that had limitations, yet God used them greatly. Jeremiah felt like he was just a child. Paul had a thorn in the flesh and admitted he was weak. Gideon felt limited by having only 300 men. Moses complained about not being able to speak well. What about you? Even in your limitations, God can be your strength. You only need ask.

“By acknowledging our boundaries and limitations, we attain greater heights than we ever will by appearing to think we know everything.” Graham Speechley

“I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my work and my God.” Helen Keller

“…For Christ’s sake, we should delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Attitude Adjustments

I actually had great expectations for my Cowboys this year. I was cautiously optimistic that this would finally be the year of the Cowboy. Don’t laugh. I really did. But, just like that, my hopes were dashed during the August 25th pre-season game. Tony Romo went down. He immediately grabbed his lower back and appeared to be in great agony. All I could do was yell at my TV screen with a loud “OH, NO!!!!”  I bet there were even worse words yelled that night from Cowboy fans.

I really loved Tony’s attitude after the injury. He said “In a weird way, I feel good about the fact that- that was probably as tough a hit I took on the back in the last five years. From that regard, I feel very lucky that it can hold up and you can keep going.” Well obviously, the injury was worse than even Romo’s positive attitude indicated. But, I refuse to be discouraged and still excited for another year of Cowboy football!

One of the ongoing issues with a broken foot is maintaining a good attitude. Every day, I deal with circumstances that can steal my joy. Take the smile flat off my face. Leave me grumpy. Irritated. Not fun to be with. Life on crutches isn’t easy. Getting through a heavy door. Getting into a car. Shopping. Waiting in line. Cooking. Driving. Constant discomfort. Pain. Not sleeping. These things have the power to crush my spirit.....if I let it.

I often need an attitude adjustment. I have learned through my experience that there are certain things I can’t control. I can’t control my injury. It is what it is. I can’t control the time it takes to heal. It is what it is. But, there are things I can control and one of those is my ATTITUDE. I can laugh a lot. I can greet people with a smile. I can reach out to others that are hurting. I can pray diligently for others. I can look for ways to bless my husband. I can practice gratitude in the little things. I can be thankful. i can forgive quickly. I can love deeply.

How about you? Every day, there are reasons for our attitude to take a nose-dive. God can help us. He is the creator of a right attitude. He wants His attitude to be our attitude! God will help us with our self-pity, our anger, our harsh words, our negativity and short temper. He can!!! You only need ask Him. Have a GREAT attitude this week!

“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:3

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- thing about such things.” Philippians 4:8

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.

Help!

It was a full-fledged gully-washer. While at a physical therapy appointment, I peered outside watching the rain come down in Texas size buckets. How would I get home? How could I maneuver the crutches through the flowing water in the parking lot?  Normally, I’d just run outside, jump through the puddles, not caring if I got wet. Not anymore. Broken ankles change things.

I need help, but don’t know what to do!!!!  

As I took a chair in the waiting room to wait out the storm, an older man with a cane in hand, stood up and asked if he could get the door. After he opened the door, he quickly said, “Where’s your car?” He asked for my keys and off he went to help me. My car was delivered right to me under a rain-free cover. True Texan kindness.

I didn’t ask for help. The older man, however, saw the situation, and reached out to meet my need. I was blown away by his kindness. I won’t forget being caught in that rainstorm anytime soon. God answered a prayer I hadn’t even prayed yet!

I need help. I hate to admit I need help! Don’t you? So often, we try to do life on our own, not wanting to be a bother to others. Yet, we need help. Help with wayward children. Help with a difficult relationship. Help with a boyfriend. Help through a divorce. Help with a project. Help with handling older parents. Help with a decision. Help with choosing a new career. Help with finances. Just when we think our challenging circumstances are gone, they pop up back up out of nowhere.

I can give help. I’m so grateful for the older man who saw my need and met it. In our busy lives, we often don’t even see the needs of others right beside us! Our relationships can be based on a periodic text, a “like” on facebook, but so little true relating.  Caring involves getting out of our comfort zone. Caring involves being willing to hear someone’s pain. Caring involves caring and that’s not always easy.

Reality check today! Are you willing to share your need for help? Can you humble yourself and admit you might benefit from a counselor, advisor or coach? Can you ask God for eyes to see those around you that might have a need?

I need help. You need help. I can help others. You can help others.  Just think how much we could change our world, if we really lived this way.

“Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.” Philippians 2:4

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.