Me-First Syndrome

As a volunteer Sunday School teacher for four and five year olds, I’ve noticed a phenomenon that happens every time I serve. As we line up to go outside, I hear a cadre of little ones letting me know in no uncertain terms that they want to BE FIRST in line. It’s funny how we catch this mentality before we can utter our first words. The “Me-First Syndrome” was caught and taught to us early in life. It’s been modeled by human beings everywhere.

 

What are some examples of the “Me-First Syndrome?”

You’re on the service road heading toward a stop light. Someone speeds up, cuts you off and slows down in front of you. Of course, that person makes it through the light, while you sit and wait.

You’re in line for a concert and a group of people cut in front of you not even noticing your presence.

You want to be the first one to give your opinion in a work meeting, but someone else grabs center stage before you can utter a word.

 

You recently got paid and want to spend as much as possible on things for yourself.

 

Looking out for number one is so much a part of us that we don’t notice the ire that swells up in us when we’re not! Wayne Jackson wrote “The “me-first” syndrome is only occasionally recognized, rarely specifically identified, and general is ignored.” Inside, we are fuming when others do this to us, but outwardly, we just move on with our day. But, lately, I feel like God is making it very obvious to me when my “me-first” syndrome kicks in. He’s showing me how selfish I can be and how I get ticked when my “me-first” rights are violated. While I’m getting irritated with others, I’m missing the lessons that God wants to teach me about my perceived rights.

 

What would your day look like if you took on an “others first” mentality? It would seem to me that the “me first” mentality would be destroyed when we adopt the “others first” principle. Yet thinking of others as more important than myself is not at all easy. It conjures up in me images of becoming a second-class doormat. That feels unfair. God’s word makes it clear that God has a plan and knows the best way for people to live in society together. When we submit to one another, we are being loving. When we submit to one another, we do so out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21) It’s realizing that when you lose your life, you find it. It’s learning gentleness, humility and a regard for others. It’s laying aside the need to be first. When does your “me first” spirit becomes front and center? How long will you continue to let it be first?

 

“Never think in lowering yourself you have less power for good.” Charles de Foucauld

 

“He must become greater; I must become less.” John 3:30

 

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.