Not So Perfect Holiday

Holidays can be wonderful times for family gatherings, scrumptious food and time away from work. But they can also be not so perfect times as well.

I think we have this cultural mindset that we’re “supposed” to be happy, thankful, and celebratory at this time of year. But that’s not true for everyone. What makes the holidays not so perfect? Recent loss of a beloved family member or friend, relationship break up, financial constraints, pain that won’t go away, depression, family strife, stress at work and sometimes just struggling to feel positive about life, to name a few. 

Just today, I was ticked off about something that got added to the Thanksgiving Day festivities, completely different than what I planned. How could something so minor become major to me? Why couldn’t I just let it go, agree to the change and just get my attitude adjusted?

When holidays are not so perfect, it’s important to just admit the obvious. Holidays are NEVER perfect. Who said they were? So, relax and let that synch in. Allow the day to flow in all its imperfections. Relax when the pie burns. Don’t worry when the turkey is dry. Keep the peace when family conversations go south. BE the difference maker in your not so perfect holiday.

Make sure you pray both before and during the holiday about your concerns. I know most my worries and concerns are relieved when I just take time to pray. Holiday relationships can be tough, but please know that God is ready and available to walk with you through your not so perfect holiday season. God comforts us when we’re downcast. (2 Corinthians 7:5-6) He doesn’t chide us or hide from us. He comforts us! He is the “Father of mercies and the God of all comfort.” (2 Corinthians 1:3) Even when things aren’t the way we want them to be, God can give us perfect peace.

Take time to share your concern with a trusted friend. Admit that your struggling and name it. Don’t be ashamed! Ask for prayer. Get advice. I did this today and I received from a friend a whole new way to look at my situation! God can encourage us through our friends!

Father in Heaven, help us be honest about our feelings, expectant of your comfort and thankful for the gift of friendship and family. Alert us this week to all the many blessings we’ve been given and help us remember to give you thanks. Help us be sensitive to the needs of others around us, even the cranky aunt or child out of control. Remind us that you are able to work in us and walk with us through these holidays and give us joy, even amidst difficulties. Thank you, God, for your goodness! We praise you this Thanksgiving for life itself. From your not so perfect child. Amen.

Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.