Kayaks loaded on top of car? Check. Dog in car? Check. Starbucks run. Check. Off we go to the Guadalupe State Park for a day on the river. There's nothing quite like getting out on the river early on a summer morning. So peaceful. So quiet. So beautiful. Ben and I kayaked down the river with our dog perched at the front of the kayak in her own hand-designed doggie perch. In a little while, we decided to dock at a spot where the fish seem to party. Then, Gracie Lou, our beloved 12-year old English Springer, quickly transformed into Fisher-Dog! Her job (she thinks) is to follow my husband step by step out into the water, barking incessantly to hopefully get those fishies to come up out of the water and play with her. Of course, my husband, an avid fisherman, laments at her antics, but can't help but bring her along. She is one spoiled mutt.
I can't help but wonder how many fish we would catch if Gracie Lou would just STOP barking. (Did I say she is deaf and doesn't hear herself?) She loves fishing so much that she can't seem to be still, quiet and wait patiently for the fish to come out. In her mind, she thinks that the barking will make things happen quicker. When the fish DO make an appearance, you can be sure she is right there to help them off the lure.
Gracie Lou hasn't learned the ways of fishing. Gracie Lou lacks patience. She wants what she wants NOW. It's easy to live reacting to our impulses, just like Gracie Lou. We make decisions as if this moment is the only thing that matters. We can live with the mindsets "It's my life; I can do whatever I want." "If it feels good, do it." "Have it my way...I deserve it." If you observe the culture around, you see this everywhere. Anger at a restaurant because the food is a tad delayed. The driver in the car behind you becoming unglued on the freeway. Or making a monumental rash decision that affects a lifetime. Somehow, we have become way too important...and shortsighted. Our egos of entitlement tell us that we deserve to get what we want when we want it.
Patience is not easy for me. But, I desire to be a more patient person. It takes effort to think, pray and ask God to slow me down. I have asked Him to show me when I'm impatient...to make me aware of when I become ego-driven with my agenda. And He does. Instead of demanding what I want when I want it, I learn that God teaches me so much in the waiting period. Proverbs 16:32 says "Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city." Ask God to give you opportunities to practice patience this week. With God's help we CAN change.
"Patience is the companion of wisdom." Saint Augustine
Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Beat the Heat!
It was just a few months ago, when we were regularly saying the phrase "Beat the Heat." Since the temps have been edging upwards here in San Antonio, we have a new meaning for the words "Beat the heat." Summers in Texas are notorious for being brutal at times. Sometimes, even the native Texan has been known to complain about the heat.
How can we embrace the season and appreciate it for what it is? For me, I try a variety of things. Lots of swimming outdoors. Cycling super-early on the weekend and being done early! Watering my half-alive flowers while standing in the sprinkler myself. Going kayaking. Going to movies. Vacations in August. Ceiling fans. Watching pre-season football, knowing the season is just around the corner.
We can also beat the heat by our attitude. Sometimes, we forget the reality that you and I have the privilege of being alive on this planet...at this time. Life is a gift and what a joy to live it, albeit in the summer or winter. Anton Chekhov once said "People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy." I love how summer is a different pace, one in which invites us to truly slow down. Who doesn't need that? As I slow down, I take time to plan for summer fun, not just get through summer.
Texas summers are but one minor bump in our lives. How do we respond to some of the bumps that life throws our way? Some of you today are carrying some pretty significant burdens in life. For all intense purposes, it's hard to find any blessing in your burden. Look hard. Look up. Know that God cares for you and loves you so very much. He will never fail you. Learn to thank God for the difficulties that come your way. Look for the blessings. There are often some really amazing blessings lurking under some of our deepest struggles.
So, yes, we may suffer with a bit of heat for the next few weeks....or even months. But, don't forget to look for the blessings. Quite complaining. Your complaints will not change a thing. You change! If anything, thank God for the gift of being alive.... here and now. Then, thank God for Willis Haviland Carrier. He created the first-large scale electrical air conditioner.
Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
How can we embrace the season and appreciate it for what it is? For me, I try a variety of things. Lots of swimming outdoors. Cycling super-early on the weekend and being done early! Watering my half-alive flowers while standing in the sprinkler myself. Going kayaking. Going to movies. Vacations in August. Ceiling fans. Watching pre-season football, knowing the season is just around the corner.
We can also beat the heat by our attitude. Sometimes, we forget the reality that you and I have the privilege of being alive on this planet...at this time. Life is a gift and what a joy to live it, albeit in the summer or winter. Anton Chekhov once said "People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy." I love how summer is a different pace, one in which invites us to truly slow down. Who doesn't need that? As I slow down, I take time to plan for summer fun, not just get through summer.
Texas summers are but one minor bump in our lives. How do we respond to some of the bumps that life throws our way? Some of you today are carrying some pretty significant burdens in life. For all intense purposes, it's hard to find any blessing in your burden. Look hard. Look up. Know that God cares for you and loves you so very much. He will never fail you. Learn to thank God for the difficulties that come your way. Look for the blessings. There are often some really amazing blessings lurking under some of our deepest struggles.
So, yes, we may suffer with a bit of heat for the next few weeks....or even months. But, don't forget to look for the blessings. Quite complaining. Your complaints will not change a thing. You change! If anything, thank God for the gift of being alive.... here and now. Then, thank God for Willis Haviland Carrier. He created the first-large scale electrical air conditioner.
Nancy Abbott is the Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Negative Thinking
Sometimes our minds can play really bad tricks on us. We can pretty easily run an ongoing dialogue in our minds that is pretty negative...about ourselves. You won't get the job! You're not that good at that! You can never lose weight. You're invisible. You're never going to get better. Why did you say that? Thoughts run amuck.
For me, negative thinking can jump into my brain faster than a blink of an eye. If I don't capture those thoughts quickly, I start to believe a bunch of things that aren't necessarily true. Toxic thoughts are very dangerous. They leave no room for truth. They settle into the deep processes of our mind and can suck the life right out of us.
The other day, my husband challenged me with some negative thinking. I bemoaned to him my crazy thinking that "I can never seem to win at...." First and foremost, he said "What do you mean win? What makes you think you have to win?" You see, I had allowed some destructive thinking to wreak havoc in my mind. Doubts, anxiety and insecurity reign as I allow such stinkin' thinkin' to settle in and make its home.
So, what's a good solution? Feeling blue, I was sitting in the parking lot at the Braundera Y waiting for a meeting. All at once a song came on. A Casting Crowns song I had heard countless times. This time, I feverishly wrote down the words. "But the giant's calling out my name and he laughs at me. reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed. The giant keeps on telling me time and time again "Boy you'll never win! You'll never win!" But the voice of truth tells me a different story. The voice of truth says "Do not be afraid!" And the voice of truth says "This is for My glory." Out of all the voices calling out to me I would choose to listen and believe the voice of truth."
God met me at the moment I needed him that day. He gave me a song. He gave me truth. I had to stop my runaway thinking. It had become toxic to my soul. Hey....you and I need to be able to hold our thoughts to a higher standard. For me, God's word breathes life into me. As I take in God's word, it leads to peace, not anxiety. Freedom to pour love on others, not be consumed with myself. Let's listen to the voice of truth today.
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things." Philippians 4:8
"As a man thinks in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 3:27
Nancy B. Abbott serves as Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
For me, negative thinking can jump into my brain faster than a blink of an eye. If I don't capture those thoughts quickly, I start to believe a bunch of things that aren't necessarily true. Toxic thoughts are very dangerous. They leave no room for truth. They settle into the deep processes of our mind and can suck the life right out of us.
The other day, my husband challenged me with some negative thinking. I bemoaned to him my crazy thinking that "I can never seem to win at...." First and foremost, he said "What do you mean win? What makes you think you have to win?" You see, I had allowed some destructive thinking to wreak havoc in my mind. Doubts, anxiety and insecurity reign as I allow such stinkin' thinkin' to settle in and make its home.
So, what's a good solution? Feeling blue, I was sitting in the parking lot at the Braundera Y waiting for a meeting. All at once a song came on. A Casting Crowns song I had heard countless times. This time, I feverishly wrote down the words. "But the giant's calling out my name and he laughs at me. reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed. The giant keeps on telling me time and time again "Boy you'll never win! You'll never win!" But the voice of truth tells me a different story. The voice of truth says "Do not be afraid!" And the voice of truth says "This is for My glory." Out of all the voices calling out to me I would choose to listen and believe the voice of truth."
God met me at the moment I needed him that day. He gave me a song. He gave me truth. I had to stop my runaway thinking. It had become toxic to my soul. Hey....you and I need to be able to hold our thoughts to a higher standard. For me, God's word breathes life into me. As I take in God's word, it leads to peace, not anxiety. Freedom to pour love on others, not be consumed with myself. Let's listen to the voice of truth today.
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things." Philippians 4:8
"As a man thinks in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 3:27
Nancy B. Abbott serves as Chaplain for the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
Friday, July 26, 2013
Madonna and Ego
I'm fascinated by a quote I recently read from Madonna: "My drive in life comes from a fear of being mediocre. That is always pushing me. I push past one spell of it and discover myself as a special human being but then I feel I am still mediocre and uninteresting unless I do something else. Because even though I have become somebody. I still have to prove that I am somebody. My struggle has never ended and I guess it never will." (Timothy Keller, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness)
So, think of it... Madonna has more than most of us can ever imagine. Madonna would be considered "successful" in the world's eyes. Madonna is known for continuously reinventing both her music and image over and over again. She has sold over 300 million records worldwide and is recognized as the best-selling female recording artist of all time by Guinness World Records. Madonna has made it. Right?
But there's a problem. Madonna, like so many of us, sees her sense of self, her desire for self-worth, as not fulfilled She is still trying to be somebody special. No matter what great concert she had the night before, the next morning, she needs to do something else. Madonna's ego is like a black hole. Nothing satisfies.
Can you relate to Madonna? Maybe our egos are like black holes as well. We can be so consumed in our minds with trying to be "somebody" and feel happy if we outdo someone else...whether it be in our position, our prestige, our possessions or accomplishments. Somehow, it just feels good. Do we just live life always looking for that elusive 'stamp of approval?' Even Madonna, despite all her fame, has not found the ultimate approval she is looking for.
If I look to people for a positive verdict about myself, sooner or later I will be disappointed. I may go for years and feel like I've won the approval and accolades from people, only to find it can change in a heartbeat. I've come to realize that I cannot look to the world around me to give me the kudos I need. Only God's opinion matters. Really. Only God. He loves you. He cares for you. He longs to have a relationship with you. He is FOR you. No one else will love or approve of you like God.
"Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next person. We say that people are proud of being rich, or cleverer or good-looking, but they are not. They are proud of being richer, or cleverer, or better-looking than others. If everyone else become equally rich, or clever, or good-looking there would be nothing to be proud about." C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity
So, think of it... Madonna has more than most of us can ever imagine. Madonna would be considered "successful" in the world's eyes. Madonna is known for continuously reinventing both her music and image over and over again. She has sold over 300 million records worldwide and is recognized as the best-selling female recording artist of all time by Guinness World Records. Madonna has made it. Right?
But there's a problem. Madonna, like so many of us, sees her sense of self, her desire for self-worth, as not fulfilled She is still trying to be somebody special. No matter what great concert she had the night before, the next morning, she needs to do something else. Madonna's ego is like a black hole. Nothing satisfies.
Can you relate to Madonna? Maybe our egos are like black holes as well. We can be so consumed in our minds with trying to be "somebody" and feel happy if we outdo someone else...whether it be in our position, our prestige, our possessions or accomplishments. Somehow, it just feels good. Do we just live life always looking for that elusive 'stamp of approval?' Even Madonna, despite all her fame, has not found the ultimate approval she is looking for.
If I look to people for a positive verdict about myself, sooner or later I will be disappointed. I may go for years and feel like I've won the approval and accolades from people, only to find it can change in a heartbeat. I've come to realize that I cannot look to the world around me to give me the kudos I need. Only God's opinion matters. Really. Only God. He loves you. He cares for you. He longs to have a relationship with you. He is FOR you. No one else will love or approve of you like God.
"Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next person. We say that people are proud of being rich, or cleverer or good-looking, but they are not. They are proud of being richer, or cleverer, or better-looking than others. If everyone else become equally rich, or clever, or good-looking there would be nothing to be proud about." C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Am I Really Listening?
My husband tells me I don't always hear everything he says. I'm hoping I'm not losing a bit of my hearing, but suffice it to say, I'm not always the best listener. Frankly, I think all of us, if honest, would admit that we lack in listening skills. Yet, if we are to hold high the value of "respecting one another" we would do well to sharpen our listening skills.
Why don't we tend to be good listeners in general? There's lots of reasons! I know that sometimes I'm guilty of thinking about how I'm going to respond, while at the same time trying to listen to someone. Not good. Often, I'm just so excited to get my two cents in that I cut the other person off. Really not good. We are all prone to interrupt because that's just what we do! We don't think twice doing it. Finally, I think we are so busy that interactions with people can just be "one more thing" that we have to do. We've got our eye on our phone and halfway listening to the person in front of us! Who knows? The email or text on the phone might be way more exciting that the person in front of you! Perish the thought of being the talker.
As we give the gift of respect to those around us each day, I think it would be thoughtful to refresh our listening skills. Here are some questions to ask yourself as you communicate to others: Do I hear every word they speak? Do I care when I hear? Do I judge when I hear? what do I wonder about? Why don't I ask them? Am I REALLY listening when they are talking OR am I thinking about what I will say next? Do I care for them OR do I care about their opinion of me? Do I leave them impressed OR make them feel good about themselves? Am I treating them the way I want them to treat me? Are they REALLY better off because I am in their life? (Doug Pollock, God Space)
So, let's make this a week where we work hard to give the gift of listening to those we come in contact with. Not only will you be blessed, but the person you listen to will be double-blessed.
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." Philippians 2:3
"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them." Ralph Nichols
Why don't we tend to be good listeners in general? There's lots of reasons! I know that sometimes I'm guilty of thinking about how I'm going to respond, while at the same time trying to listen to someone. Not good. Often, I'm just so excited to get my two cents in that I cut the other person off. Really not good. We are all prone to interrupt because that's just what we do! We don't think twice doing it. Finally, I think we are so busy that interactions with people can just be "one more thing" that we have to do. We've got our eye on our phone and halfway listening to the person in front of us! Who knows? The email or text on the phone might be way more exciting that the person in front of you! Perish the thought of being the talker.
As we give the gift of respect to those around us each day, I think it would be thoughtful to refresh our listening skills. Here are some questions to ask yourself as you communicate to others: Do I hear every word they speak? Do I care when I hear? Do I judge when I hear? what do I wonder about? Why don't I ask them? Am I REALLY listening when they are talking OR am I thinking about what I will say next? Do I care for them OR do I care about their opinion of me? Do I leave them impressed OR make them feel good about themselves? Am I treating them the way I want them to treat me? Are they REALLY better off because I am in their life? (Doug Pollock, God Space)
So, let's make this a week where we work hard to give the gift of listening to those we come in contact with. Not only will you be blessed, but the person you listen to will be double-blessed.
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." Philippians 2:3
"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them." Ralph Nichols
Conquering Fear
Just this last week, my husband and I spent some time in Durango, Colorado. While my husband was on a solo backpacking journey, I decided to take a half day horseback ride along the Piedra River near Pagosa Springs. The ride would cover over 13 miles along the rim of the river, with gorgeous views along the way. Our leader? Stoney, an older cowboy, who had had one leg amputated 17 years ago from a horse accident. He entertained all three of us riders along the trail with interesting stories form his life as a cowboy and history of the area.
I don't remember reading anywhere on-line warning potential riders about the steep cliffs and narrow paths we would encounter along the way. However, it wasn't long after our departure, that our little motley crew started climbing up some pretty intense trails. Soon, we were towering above the Piedra River, looking straight down about 100 yards at times. Our little trail would often fade away from the erosion, leaving little room for our horses to mark their path. Thankfully, these were some sure-footed horses! Every time, we'd hit an area of difficulty, Cowboy Stoney would say with a smile "That's the roughest area we've had....so far." Soon, we would encounter another area that was a tad scarier. Cowboy Stoney even told us about a time recently when he and his mare had encountered a bear along the path. His mare still snorts loudly as she passes that spot.
I love horses. I love mountains. And honestly, the ride was incredible. However, there were points along the way that I was pretty scared. I was involved in an accident on a mountain road in Idaho years ago and heights can still affect me. Knowing full well my horse Haley would sense my fear, I really worked hard to just sit, relax in the saddle and enjoy the ride and scenery.
Fear can grip us when we least expect it. We can actually live in fear wondering about all the 'what ifs' that could potentially happen. The French philosopher Montaigne said "My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened." How true! Isn't it amazing how young children often have no fear? Yet, as time goes on in life, we see things happen and become aware of the "what ifs' of life. Many of us live paralyzed by fear.
How about you? What are you afraid of? I'm so grateful that God cares about all my fears. No matter how big or small, God wants us to bring Him all our fears. He will listen and meet us in those fears. Even David in the Bible, who went through a lot of horrible scary circumstances was able to say with confidence "The Lord is my Salvation; Of whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1) Let's start our day saying NO to fear!
Nancy Abbott serves as the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
I don't remember reading anywhere on-line warning potential riders about the steep cliffs and narrow paths we would encounter along the way. However, it wasn't long after our departure, that our little motley crew started climbing up some pretty intense trails. Soon, we were towering above the Piedra River, looking straight down about 100 yards at times. Our little trail would often fade away from the erosion, leaving little room for our horses to mark their path. Thankfully, these were some sure-footed horses! Every time, we'd hit an area of difficulty, Cowboy Stoney would say with a smile "That's the roughest area we've had....so far." Soon, we would encounter another area that was a tad scarier. Cowboy Stoney even told us about a time recently when he and his mare had encountered a bear along the path. His mare still snorts loudly as she passes that spot.
I love horses. I love mountains. And honestly, the ride was incredible. However, there were points along the way that I was pretty scared. I was involved in an accident on a mountain road in Idaho years ago and heights can still affect me. Knowing full well my horse Haley would sense my fear, I really worked hard to just sit, relax in the saddle and enjoy the ride and scenery.
Fear can grip us when we least expect it. We can actually live in fear wondering about all the 'what ifs' that could potentially happen. The French philosopher Montaigne said "My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened." How true! Isn't it amazing how young children often have no fear? Yet, as time goes on in life, we see things happen and become aware of the "what ifs' of life. Many of us live paralyzed by fear.
How about you? What are you afraid of? I'm so grateful that God cares about all my fears. No matter how big or small, God wants us to bring Him all our fears. He will listen and meet us in those fears. Even David in the Bible, who went through a lot of horrible scary circumstances was able to say with confidence "The Lord is my Salvation; Of whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1) Let's start our day saying NO to fear!
Nancy Abbott serves as the Chaplain of the YMCA of Greater San Antonio.
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